HP Month and the epic blockage

Nervous.

September is HP Month. Just a thing venis_envy and I are doing to turn back time a year or so and write some Harry/Draco fic. It probably should have been titled H/D month, but whatever.

Everything I write sucks right now. I have no 'flow'. To achieve my intent with a story, I'm having to go very slow and very careful, often pulling back several hundred words to restart.

And I'm starting a lot of really, really rubbish things. Watching my dropbox fill up with badly executed plot bunnies and my AO3 subscriber count drop every time I post something I actually finish.

So my confidence is in the toilet. Which is an unpleasant place to be, but oh well, not like it hasn't been there before and come back again. Annoying, though, right when I want to write some H/D, a pairing I really enjoyed writing around the epic block of 2012.

I was very new to writing HP at the beginning of that. I finished a couple first drafts, started some others, planned some more. And six months later when I finally came out of it (longest.block.ever) it was Harry and Draco that I wrote.

Then Teen Wolf happened, and I've been sort of consumed by it since. I occasionally branch out, I wrote some H/D during NaNo (that's coming up fast, too, another reason to freak the fuck out, but if I'm prepared to write it off as another never-shared NaNo Novel it's guaranteed to break the block—NaNo always does) last year, I've written some Buffy and some Supernatural fic, but Teen Wolf is very comfort zone/main fandom for me.

But it looks weird on my AO3 dash. I feel like I was in HP fandom for some time, I feel like I wrote a lot, and I feel comfortable with Harry and Draco, but looking at the works count you wouldn't think so. I recently posted my 69th Teen Wolf fic, and HP count is like, five.

But. There's an everloving crapload of half finished HP fic in my dropbox. There's at least two finished fics (one's still on paper, and it went to the US with me in 2012 and I haven't looked at it since. I imagine it needs a lot of work, but editing, I can do). I have my Season of Kink Bingo to at least make an attempt at before the deadline at the end of September.

I can do this. I'm going to fucking do this.

*tries to ignore the gnawing guilt over neglected (but not abandoned) Teen Wolf WiP's*